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Today is the best part of Thrifty Goodness: Shopping day. As I laboriously entered in data all last weekend (and again this weekend!) and went a little bug eyed in the process, I couldn’t help but reflect on the fact that what I adore is Thursday. It really is the best part of the whole deal! I spend several hours digging for treasure and chatting with the store owners. I’m on first name basis with several of them; we trade thrifty stories as I dig through bins or across the counter as they ring up my sale. Most of them work so hard to keep their spaces organized and clean—which makes my life easier. There are certain owners I know will give me a deal just because they like me… and there’s nothing better than leaving with an armful of goodies I know other people will adore. Or I hope! I have my favorites; take Sherry, who reminds me to spell her name with a y, “Like the cordial. Just as sweet.” And she is.

But not all days bring in a haul. It is inevitable that you will walk into a store and find nothing. It happens. Worse still, is when you walk into all your haunts and come up empty! Some days, you have to be satisfied with the little personal contact you get with terribly nice people. On those days, like today, I remind myself that there is more to life than just passing through, more treasure to find than the tangible goods I buy. More to give than to take, more waiting for me if I stop and pay attention.

It makes a difference how we treat each other.

I came home this afternoon, with little to show for my day, to a hesitant IZ. When asked what was wrong, he quietly told me that we had received some very nasty mail. He’d read it already, so he handed it to me to read but offered to distill the salient information if I wanted to avoid the bile.

You should know, I’m absolutely the most obsessive person when it comes to mail and email. I CAN’T wait to open anything. Good or bad, I’m ripping into things the minute I get them. Sometimes before I realize it’s not my name on the package! In the case of bad news, I’m all for not delaying the agony, but ripping off the bandaid quickly! And then, because I can’t leave well enough alone, I turn the information around over and over again until I find myself in knots.

But not today. Today, I listened to the cliff-notes version from a very nice guy who does not obsess like I do! Listening to his synopsis, I couldn’t help but marvel at the response of some adults when they don’t get what they want. As the parent of a 10 year old, the anger and frustration and refusal to accept responsibility for their actions sounds so familiar! I know a melt-down when I see it! (And boy have I seen them!) But this melt-down was stunning, even in its annotated form.

What can you do? Whatever cliche you choose, the reality of our experience is that most sweet days are still salted. We take the good with the bad. Is there any other choice?

The juxtaposition of the sweet and salty in my day has stayed with me. Some days function as object lessons. I’m not turned into knots over this—but am cognizant that it does make a difference how we treat each other. It does make a difference the words we choose to speak to one another. And ultimately, we choose what take with us, what we focus on, what remains.

I know this much; for a day that did not bring in a huge thrifting haul this day certainly had its own rewards. I’m holding onto that bounty. I hope you do too!

(Note: The earrings are from my thrifting adventures this week: they were made by one of the Women at the Resource Center.)