Boy Wonder (storming through the door after walking Sophie): “MOM! This darn dog!”

Me: “What’s up?”

Boy Wonder: “WELL! She’s just refusant! She’s belligerously refusing to go through the door!”

IZ (looking at me): Good job there, English Teacher.

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Joke’s on him, though—because I also teach creative writing. I have two words for you, Snarky Boy: HARRY POTTER. *snap snap*. (also two words.)